Walk the World

Today, on 7 June 2009, hundreds of thousands of people across the globe in 24 times zone walks together to raise funds and awareness for United Nations World Food Programme's work to end child hunger. The event is named 'Walk the World', one of the biggest global events against hunger. The WFP walk in Indonesia is also sponsored by the national philanthropy organization Dompet Dhuafa.

WFP's school feeding programmes provide meals to over 20 million children each year, giving them the food and the motivation they need to go to school and build a better future for themselves.

Alternative to 'Walk the World' is 'Walk the Web', where each dollar donated on 'Walk the Web' counts as a mile walked, with WFP's target to achieve 25,000 miles walking distance around the world. I am unable to join the walk itself today, so I've made a small donation, with a glimmer of hope, that it'll make a difference in the life of a hungry child.

Looking forward to join again next year. See if you can find my photo in the Wall Against Hunger, if not, look closely.

Earth Hour 2009

Yesterday night, my friend and I observed the 2009 Earth Hour, from 20:30 till 21:30, Jakarta's time. Along with us, 83 countries the world over were participating, turning off lights for an hour to raise awareness of global warming.

In Jakarta, the local government committed to turn off the lights in 5 of the city's icons: the City Hall, the the National Monument, the fountain of Arjuna Wiwaha, the Youth Statue at Senayan, and the Welcoming Monument at Hotel Indonesia roundabout. I suppose you can guess where I was from the video?

And this is the scenery when all the lights were turned on again:

I know there are some of you out there questioning the purpose of such event, and if it could really curb climate change. Well, directly? It's not nearly enough.

The event was held to raise awareness for the public at large of efforts that can be done to stop global warming, and to raise their curiosity of climate change, its dangers, and measures to be taken to save the planet.

For the act was so simple, yet done en masse it would put a dent in the amount of carbon emitted in one day. Imagine the possibility of more complex, concerted, and conscious efforts could have done?

Sistem Jaminan Sosial, Peluang dan Tantangan

[After visiting Farid and Erisa's blog on their published writings of Shariah bond, I got inspired to post my own published writings here. After all, it is also an opportunity to post my original writing as I had intended, without the editor's cut. There is also the added benefit of hyperlinks through this medium. The article was published on Kompas, 22 December 2008. It's about the opportunities and challenges presented by a new regulation over social security in Indonesia, especially one affecting the pharmaceutical industry. Sorry, it's in Bahasa since it was published on Kompas.]

Setelah menyaksikan terpilihnya Barack Obama sebagai Presiden Amerika Serikat yang ke-44 pada 4 November 2008, kita disadarkan akan peristiwa serupa yang akan kita lalui pada 9 April 2009 mendatang, yaitu Pemilu. Pada Pemilu 2009, untuk kedua kalinya kita akan memilih kepala negara secara langsung. Namun, sudah kita ketahui bersama bahwa pertarungan kebijakan pada saat kampanye tidaklah mendominasi proses pemilihan umum di Indonesia. Sekalipun ada banyak pokok persoalan (issues) yang layak untuk diperdebatkan dan ditawarkan solusinya oleh capres dan caleg yang bersaing memperebutkan suara rakyat. Pelayanan kesehatan, khususnya pengadaan asuransi kesehatan nasional, dapat diangkat menjadi issue penting dalam kampanye mengingat masih terbatasnya akses bagi sebagian besar masyarakat umum di Indonesia.

Tidak kurang dari Kementrian Koordinator Bidang Kesejahteraan Rakyat menyebutkan setidaknya 100 juta penduduk belum mendapatkan jaminan kesehatan melalui suatu skema jaringan pengaman kesehatan. Apabila mengasumsikan 45 juta pegawai negeri sipil dan TNI/Polri yang dilindungi Askes, Taspen, dan Asabri ditambah 8 juta pekerja yang dilindungi Jamsostek serta 36 juta masyarakat miskin yang dijamin pemerintah melalui Askes, maka tingkat penetrasi jaminan kesehatan hanya sekitar 40% dari total populasi yang diperkirakan mencapai 227 juta di tahun 2008. Sisanya sebesar 60% harus menanggung sendiri biaya kesehatan secara langsung (out-of-pocket).

Model Dasar Kebijakan Pelayanan Kesehatan (Health Care)

Menurut T.R. Reid, koresponden senior The Washington Post dan kritikus kebijakan health care, ada empat model dasar dalam kebijakan pelayanan kesehatan. Pertama, model Beveridge, dinamai dari ekonom Inggris William Beveridge, penemu Sistem Kesehatan Nasional (National Health Service – NHS). Dalam sistem ini, setiap warga negara berhak menggunakan layanan kesehatan dan tidak akan pernah menerima tagihan karena pembiayaannya didanai oleh pajak. Negara, sebagai pembayar tunggal (sole payer), menentukan pelayanan kesehatan yang dapat diberikan dokter dan harga yang dapat mereka tagihkan. Fasilitas kesehatan dan tenaga medis dimiliki oleh negara. Pihak swasta dapat menagih pelayanan yang mereka berikan langsung kepada pemerintah. Inggris, Spanyol, dan Selandia Baru adalah contoh negara yang menggunakan sistem ini.

Kedua, model Bismarck, dinamai dari Kanselir Jerman pertama, Otto von Bismarck. Sistem ini menggunakan asuransi kesehatan yang didanai oleh penyedia kerja dan karyawan melalui pemotongan gaji. Asuransi ini wajib melindungi seluruh warga negara dan tidak diperbolehkan mengambil keuntungan. Fasilitas kesehatan dan tenaga medis boleh dimiliki oleh swasta dan jumlah penyedia (provider) asuransi pun tidak dibatasi. Sekalipun model ini tidak menggunakan sistem pembayar tunggal, regulasi yang ketat dapat memberikan kewenangan yang besar bagi Negara layaknya dalam model Beveridge. Kompetisi terjadi baik di antara lembaga asuransi nirlaba maupun penyedia layanan kesehatan karena didorong oleh motivasi manajemen untuk mendapatkan kompensasi yang meningkat seiring dengan meluasnya cakupan asuransi dan layanan kesehatan yang diberikan. Model Bismarck di antaranya digunakan di Jerman, Perancis, Belanda, dan Jepang.

Ketiga, model Asuransi Kesehatan Nasional (National Health Insurance) yang merupakan gabungan dari model Beveridge dan Bismarck. Sistem ini menggunakan pihak swasta sebagai penyedia layanan kesehatan, dengan pembayaran klaim yang didanai dari program asuransi nasional. Program asuransi ini dikelola oleh pemerintah dan setiap warga negara wajib membayar premi. Dengan tidak adanya kebutuhan pemasaran dan perolehan keuntungan, program asuransi universal seperti ini cenderung lebih murah dalam biaya dan lebih mudah dalam administrasinya. Asuransi nasional sebagai pembayar tunggal mempunyai kekuatan pasar yang besar untuk menegosiasikan harga yang lebih rendah kepada pihak swasta selaku penyedia layanan kesehatan. Sistem ini dapat ditemui di Kanada, Taiwan, dan Korea Selatan.

Keempat, model biaya sendiri (out-of-pocket). Sebagian besar penduduk dunia tidak mendapatkan akses layanan kesehatan. Hal ini dikarenakan sebagian besar Negara di dunia terlalu miskin dan tidak terkoordinasi untuk menyediakan layanan medis secara masal. Sebagai contoh, ratusan juta penduduk di pedalaman Afrika, India, Cina, dan Amerika Latin tidak pernah berobat ke dokter, melainkan merujuk kepada pengobatan alternatif. Dalam model terakhir ini, pasien baru akan mendapatkan layanan kesehatan apabila dapat membayar langsung sendiri, dan bagi mereka yang tidak mampu maka terpaksa harus menahan sakit dan bahkan meregang nyawa.

Sistem Jaminan Sosial Nasional

Berdasarkan Undang-Undang Nomor 40 tahun 2004 tentang SJSN, sistem jaminan kesehatan di Indonesia mengarah antara model Bismarck atau model Asuransi Kesehatan Nasional. Dewan Jaminan Sosial Nasional (DJSN), yang terbentuk pada bulan Oktober 2008 lalu akan menjadi pengemban amanat SJSN dan akan menunjuk atau membentuk Badan Penyelenggara Jaminan Sosial (BPJS). Sekalipun RUU BPJS masih dalam pembahasan, PT Askes telah disebut sebagai salah satu BPJS dalam UU No. 40/2004.

DJSN menargetkan bahwa pada tahun 2012 nanti seluruh penduduk Indonesia akan mendapat perlindungan asuransi kesehatan. Menurut Data Statistik Indonesia yang dikeluarkan oleh Badan Pusat Statistik (BPS), jumlah penduduk Indonesia sampai tahun 2005 adalah 219 juta jiwa. Apabila diproyeksikan dengan asumsi laju pertambahan penduduk per tahun sebesar 1.3% sesuai data BPS periode 2000-2005, maka sampai tahun 2012 akan terjadi pertambahan penduduk sebesar hampir 21 juta jiwa sehingga jumlah penduduk yang harus dilindungi menjadi 240 juta juta jiwa.

DJSN akan memulai perluasan cakupan (coverage) Jamkesnas pada tahun 2009 dengan mengalokasikan anggaran sebesar Rp 5,9 triliun yang akan mencakup 76,4 juta penduduk. Dana ini adalah sebesar 0,11% dari perkiraan Pendapatan Domestik Bruto (PDB) tahun 2009 sebesar Rp 5.306 triliun. Sebagai perbandingan, data World Health Statistics yang diterbitkan WHO menunjukkan pengeluaran pemerintah Indonesia untuk kesehatan pada tahun 2005 sebesar 0,98% dari PDB. Malaysia mengalokasikan 1,88% dari PDB, Filipina 1,17%, dan Thailand 2,24%. Ini menunjukkan bahwa kita masih sangat jauh bahkan dari standar Negara-negara tetangga.

DJSN menargetkan cakupan Jamkesnas yang menyeluruh bagi 240 juta penduduk Indonesia pada tahun 2012 dan akan mempersiapkan anggaran sebesar Rp 20 triliun. Apabila disetarakan, maka dana tersebut setara dengan iuran premi per tahun sebesar Rp 83.500 per orang, yang menunjukkan kenaikan rata-rata 2,6% per tahun sejak 2009. Kenaikan premi ini tidak sebanding dengan inflasi rata-rata 5,8% pada periode yang sama, berdasarkan perkiraan Danareksa Research Institute. Terlebih lagi secara historis biaya kesehatan mengalami laju kenaikan harga yang lebih tinggi dibandingkan dengan inflasi, seperti yang dialami oleh Amerika Serikat di mana biaya kesehatan mengalami pertumbuhan dua hingga tiga kali inflasi tahunan. Sehingga perlu dicermati terjadinya kemungkinan layanan kesehatan yang diberikan akan mengalami penurunan dari segi kuantitas dan/atau kualitas.

Dampak Terhadap Sektor Farmasi

Data World Health Statistics menunjukkan total pengeluaran di Indonesia pada tahun 2005 untuk kesehatan adalah 2,1% PDB atau setara dengan Rp 58,3 triliun. Pengeluaran sebesar ini dialokasikan antara lain kepada jasa kesehatan (dokter dan perawat) serta pembelian alat kesehatan dan obat-obatan (farmasi). Apabila pasar farmasi di tahun yang sama bernilai Rp 22,9 triliun sesuai data IMS Health, maka dapat diasumsikan bahwa rata-rata pengeluaran obat adalah sekitar 40% dari total biaya kesehatan. Dengan asumsi bahwa 40% dari kucuran dana asuransi kesehatan nasional (Rp 5,9 triliun) mengalir ke sektor farmasi, maka diperkirakan pada tahun 2009 akan terjadi penambahan nilai Rp 2.4 triliun pada sektor ini. Namun jumlah ini hanyalah 8% dari nilai industri farmasi nasional di tahun 2007 sebesar Rp 29,6 triliun. Ini menunjukkan bahwa kontribusi tambahan dengan adanya SJSN masih sangat terbatas terhadap pertumbuhan pendapatan pada sektor farmasi. Terlebih lagi dengan pertumbuhan dana premi yang hanya 2,6% per tahun yang mana masih di bawah inflasi tahunan sebesar 5,8%, maka akan semakin sulit untuk mengharapkan kontribusi yang signifikan dari SJSN.

Namun, meski industri farmasi secara umum akan mengalami perluasan pasar akibat naiknya permintaan, tidak semua perusahaan farmasi akan dapat merasakan keuntungan tersebut. Menilik dari potensi ketidakcukupan biaya premi untuk menutup pengeluaran kesehatan, maka Pemerintah selaku regulator dapat mensyaratkan penggunaan obat-obatan generik secara eksklusif. Sehingga yang paling banyak diuntungkan adalah BUMN farmasi di mana obat generik dapat mencapai 70% dari porsi pendapatan mereka.

Meski dampak langsung dari program SJSN tidak signifikan terhadap sektor farmasi, akan tetapi ini merupakan langkah awal yang baik menuju pembentukan sistem jaring pengaman sosial masyarakat. Dengan menyetarakan anggaran Negara supaya sejajar dengan Negara-negara tetangga, maka dampak pada sektor pelayanan kesehatan secara keseluruhan akan lebih dirasakan positif. Sudah waktunya masyarakat Indonesia mendapatkan akses ke pelayanan kesehatan yang layak dan terjangkau. Kiranya hal ini perlu menjadi perhatian para pemangku kepentingan dan pembuat kebijakan untuk menentukan arah kebijakan dalam pelayanan kesehatan menjelang Pemilu 2009.

[So very briefly, the early steps toward providing social security for the people of Indonesia, especially in the health care provision, will open up new opportunities for pharmaceutical industry as enlarged business volume can be expected as a result of increased government expenditure. However, such volume expansion will be limited due to relatively smaller fund allocated for the initiative compared to the neighboring countries in ASEAN. Furthermore, potentially only state-owned pharmas who would benefit from the initative as the government would be able to exert its "single payer" power over generic drugs. Further risk concerning the limited fund may result in declining service quality and/or quantity. Such an important issue should be under public scrutiny coming this election year. Voters may influence the future of their health care benefits, that is if they can start being critical with their candidates' policies.]

Obama's Victory Speech

This afternoon, my colleagues and I watched the TV in our office library enthusiastically. In what probably the most watched political race of the year, I feel to have witnessed history in the making. Obama's speech was probably the most inspiring and the best live speech I have heard up til now. I shivered as those words came out from him. Wow.



The following is an exact transcript of his speech, taken from CNN website:

Hello, Chicago.

If there is anyone out there who still doubts that America is a place where all things are possible, who still wonders if the dream of our founders is alive in our time, who still questions the power of our democracy, tonight is your answer.

It's the answer told by lines that stretched around schools and churches in numbers this nation has never seen, by people who waited three hours and four hours, many for the first time in their lives, because they believed that this time must be different, that their voices could be that difference.

It's the answer spoken by young and old, rich and poor, Democrat and Republican, black, white, Hispanic, Asian, Native American, gay, straight, disabled and not disabled. Americans who sent a message to the world that we have never been just a collection of individuals or a collection of red states and blue states.

We are, and always will be, the United States of America.

It's the answer that led those who've been told for so long by so many to be cynical and fearful and doubtful about what we can achieve to put their hands on the arc of history and bend it once more toward the hope of a better day.

It's been a long time coming, but tonight, because of what we did on this date in this election at this defining moment change has come to America.

A little bit earlier this evening, I received an extraordinarily gracious call from Sen. McCain.

Sen. McCain fought long and hard in this campaign. And he's fought even longer and harder for the country that he loves. He has endured sacrifices for America that most of us cannot begin to imagine. We are better off for the service rendered by this brave and selfless leader.

I congratulate him; I congratulate Gov. Palin for all that they've achieved. And I look forward to working with them to renew this nation's promise in the months ahead.

I want to thank my partner in this journey, a man who campaigned from his heart, and spoke for the men and women he grew up with on the streets of Scranton and rode with on the train home to Delaware, the vice president-elect of the United States, Joe Biden.

And I would not be standing here tonight without the unyielding support of my best friend for the last 16 years the rock of our family, the love of my life, the nation's next first lady Michelle Obama.

Sasha and Malia I love you both more than you can imagine. And you have earned the new puppy that's coming with us to the new White House.

And while she's no longer with us, I know my grandmother's watching, along with the family that made me who I am. I miss them tonight. I know that my debt to them is beyond measure.

To my sister Maya, my sister Alma, all my other brothers and sisters, thank you so much for all the support that you've given me. I am grateful to them.

And to my campaign manager, David Plouffe, the unsung hero of this campaign, who built the best -- the best political campaign, I think, in the history of the United States of America.

To my chief strategist David Axelrod who's been a partner with me every step of the way.

To the best campaign team ever assembled in the history of politics you made this happen, and I am forever grateful for what you've sacrificed to get it done.

But above all, I will never forget who this victory truly belongs to. It belongs to you. It belongs to you.

I was never the likeliest candidate for this office. We didn't start with much money or many endorsements. Our campaign was not hatched in the halls of Washington. It began in the backyards of Des Moines and the living rooms of Concord and the front porches of Charleston. It was built by working men and women who dug into what little savings they had to give $5 and $10 and $20 to the cause.

It grew strength from the young people who rejected the myth of their generation's apathy who left their homes and their families for jobs that offered little pay and less sleep.

It drew strength from the not-so-young people who braved the bitter cold and scorching heat to knock on doors of perfect strangers, and from the millions of Americans who volunteered and organized and proved that more than two centuries later a government of the people, by the people, and for the people has not perished from the Earth.

This is your victory.

And I know you didn't do this just to win an election. And I know you didn't do it for me.

You did it because you understand the enormity of the task that lies ahead. For even as we celebrate tonight, we know the challenges that tomorrow will bring are the greatest of our lifetime -- two wars, a planet in peril, the worst financial crisis in a century.

Even as we stand here tonight, we know there are brave Americans waking up in the deserts of Iraq and the mountains of Afghanistan to risk their lives for us.

There are mothers and fathers who will lie awake after the children fall asleep and wonder how they'll make the mortgage or pay their doctors' bills or save enough for their child's college education.

There's new energy to harness, new jobs to be created, new schools to build, and threats to meet, alliances to repair.

The road ahead will be long. Our climb will be steep. We may not get there in one year or even in one term. But, America, I have never been more hopeful than I am tonight that we will get there.

I promise you, we as a people will get there.

There will be setbacks and false starts. There are many who won't agree with every decision or policy I make as president. And we know the government can't solve every problem.

But I will always be honest with you about the challenges we face. I will listen to you, especially when we disagree. And, above all, I will ask you to join in the work of remaking this nation, the only way it's been done in America for 221 years -- block by block, brick by brick, calloused hand by calloused hand.

What began 21 months ago in the depths of winter cannot end on this autumn night.

This victory alone is not the change we seek. It is only the chance for us to make that change. And that cannot happen if we go back to the way things were.

It can't happen without you, without a new spirit of service, a new spirit of sacrifice.

So let us summon a new spirit of patriotism, of responsibility, where each of us resolves to pitch in and work harder and look after not only ourselves but each other.

Let us remember that, if this financial crisis taught us anything, it's that we cannot have a thriving Wall Street while Main Street suffers.

In this country, we rise or fall as one nation, as one people. Let's resist the temptation to fall back on the same partisanship and pettiness and immaturity that has poisoned our politics for so long.

Let's remember that it was a man from this state who first carried the banner of the Republican Party to the White House, a party founded on the values of self-reliance and individual liberty and national unity.

Those are values that we all share. And while the Democratic Party has won a great victory tonight, we do so with a measure of humility and determination to heal the divides that have held back our progress.

As Lincoln said to a nation far more divided than ours, we are not enemies but friends. Though passion may have strained, it must not break our bonds of affection.

And to those Americans whose support I have yet to earn, I may not have won your vote tonight, but I hear your voices. I need your help. And I will be your president, too.

And to all those watching tonight from beyond our shores, from parliaments and palaces, to those who are huddled around radios in the forgotten corners of the world, our stories are singular, but our destiny is shared, and a new dawn of American leadership is at hand.

To those -- to those who would tear the world down: We will defeat you. To those who seek peace and security: We support you. And to all those who have wondered if America's beacon still burns as bright: Tonight we proved once more that the true strength of our nation comes not from the might of our arms or the scale of our wealth, but from the enduring power of our ideals: democracy, liberty, opportunity and unyielding hope.

That's the true genius of America: that America can change. Our union can be perfected. What we've already achieved gives us hope for what we can and must achieve tomorrow.

This election had many firsts and many stories that will be told for generations. But one that's on my mind tonight's about a woman who cast her ballot in Atlanta. She's a lot like the millions of others who stood in line to make their voice heard in this election except for one thing: Ann Nixon Cooper is 106 years old.

She was born just a generation past slavery; a time when there were no cars on the road or planes in the sky; when someone like her couldn't vote for two reasons -- because she was a woman and because of the color of her skin.

And tonight, I think about all that she's seen throughout her century in America -- the heartache and the hope; the struggle and the progress; the times we were told that we can't, and the people who pressed on with that American creed: Yes we can.

At a time when women's voices were silenced and their hopes dismissed, she lived to see them stand up and speak out and reach for the ballot. Yes we can.

When there was despair in the dust bowl and depression across the land, she saw a nation conquer fear itself with a New Deal, new jobs, a new sense of common purpose. Yes we can.

When the bombs fell on our harbor and tyranny threatened the world, she was there to witness a generation rise to greatness and a democracy was saved. Yes we can.

She was there for the buses in Montgomery, the hoses in Birmingham, a bridge in Selma, and a preacher from Atlanta who told a people that "We Shall Overcome." Yes we can.

A man touched down on the moon, a wall came down in Berlin, a world was connected by our own science and imagination.

And this year, in this election, she touched her finger to a screen, and cast her vote, because after 106 years in America, through the best of times and the darkest of hours, she knows how America can change.

Yes we can.

America, we have come so far. We have seen so much. But there is so much more to do. So tonight, let us ask ourselves -- if our children should live to see the next century; if my daughters should be so lucky to live as long as Ann Nixon Cooper, what change will they see? What progress will we have made?

This is our chance to answer that call. This is our moment.

This is our time, to put our people back to work and open doors of opportunity for our kids; to restore prosperity and promote the cause of peace; to reclaim the American dream and reaffirm that fundamental truth, that, out of many, we are one; that while we breathe, we hope. And where we are met with cynicism and doubts and those who tell us that we can't, we will respond with that timeless creed that sums up the spirit of a people: Yes, we can.

Thank you. God bless you. And may God bless the United States of America.

Can Some Violence Be Justified Under Islam?

"But guys like me get involved in things sometimes because nobody else will... Because it's not in the rule book, or it's politically inconvenient, or it's too weird, or -- or simply because nobody else cares.

The government, the big corporations, the money guys... they all have plenty of people willing to put it all on the line to defend them. But somebody in trouble... the kind of guy wiser minds would say should be left to solve his own problems, who does he go to?

Lots of the other super-guys live in shadows because what they do is stuff you'd never, ever want to know about... because you'd never sleep well again. Leaving them alone to operate as they see fit give you deniability, and lets them dive in where logic would say "stay away".

So maybe the best solution would be a kind of good samaritan law, like they have for drivers, where you can protect everybody when one person dives in to do something to help, while everybody else just drives past."

- Spider-Man in Civil War (Amazing Spider-Man # 531)

[This afternoon, my family and I went for halal-bihalal - an Indonesian unique tradition of mutual begging of pardon performed after Eid al-Fitr celebration - with our extended family members. I haven't seen most of them (or rather, most of them haven't seen me) for years since before I went abroad.

What I found most interesting was the discussion I had with the clergyman during lunch after the short sermon regarding the story of Prophet Muhammad and a blind jewish beggar. You can read the story here. I asked the clergyman why the Prophet's thoughtful behavior, as told in the story, stands at a stark contrast to some of the modern Muslim organizations' actions - since they proclaim to be acting under the guidance of Holy Quran and the Prophet's example - against what are deemed as society's moral decay. Violent raids targeting night clubs and bars, for example, have occurred in various parts of the country. Such as this, recorded by the media:



Such acts are justified, according to the clergyman, since there are no law enforcement or other forces be it political or social that are capable and willing to stop the morality decay which is happening in society today. Someone have to act on their behalf, and willing to assume the bad press, in order to protect the society's moral values. Just like what Spider-Man told the judges, "...they get involved in things sometimes because nobody else will... or simply because nobody else cares."

What can I say? ]

Single vs. Married - Part 2

[Why do I decide to suddenly write about a topic of being single and being married? Well, a very dear friend of mine has lost his confidence in that sacred institution known as marriage. He is not the first person, that I know of, who holds that view. What made him different was that only awhile ago, he was talking about marriage and having kids of his own, before changing his view only very recently.

He becomes skeptic that unconditional love exists and that many people do want to share the rest of their life with their spouses because of that love. I am not trying to prove one way or the other. Similar to him, I am too in the process of learning about the state of singleness and matrimony. So, I dig in my archive inbox to find old emails that perhaps may shed some lights to this aspect of life's purpose.

The following is an article, written in Bahasa Indonesia, forwarded by another colleague, Neda, on 15 July 2008. A fellow marriage skeptic at one point in time, but let's discuss about that some other time.]

Membebaskan Diri dari Obsesi Menikah

Setelah menyelesaikan kuliah S2-nya di Australia , Becky (29) memutuskan untuk bekerja di Indonesia dan melanjutkan salah satu "tujuan hidupnya" yaitu mencari suami. Namun pencariannya ternyata tidak mudah, akhirnya ia menerima cinta teman sekantornya meski sebenarnya tidak ada kecocokan di antara mereka.

Tidak mengherankan kalau hubungan mereka dipenuhi pertengkaran, tapi Becky tetap bertahan sambil berharap kekasihnya itu segera melamar. Sang kekasih akhirnya melamar, tapi bukan ke Becky, melainkan wanita lain yang selama ini juga dikencaninya.

Mungkin kita akan bertanya-tanya, mengapa seorang wanita berpendidikan tinggi seperti Becky mau melakukan hal bodoh dengan menghabiskan waktu dengan seseorang yang salah.

Masih banyak Becky lain di sekitar kita, meski dunia semakin canggih, tetap saja menikah masih menjadi tujuan hidup banyak orang. Sebenarnya apa yang menjadi motivasi orang-orang yang terobsesi untuk menikah?

Yuk, simak uraian berikut:

1. Sindrom "Tidak Bisa Hidup Sendiri"
Banyak orang yang memutuskan menikah dengan pasangannya karena merasa tidak bisa hidup tanpa pasangannya. Akibatnya terjadi semacam shock di awal pernikahan. Menurut Mary Jo Fay, konsultan di situs helpfromsurvivor.com, jika Anda memiliki sindrom tersebut, ingatlah bahwa orang tua Anda telah mengurus Anda dengan baik, berpikirlah dua kali karena berada di bawah "asuhan" pasangan yang sebenarnya tidak cocok hanya akan membawa Anda dalam hubungan yang tidak sehat.

2. Target Hidup
Biasanya orang, khususnya perempuan, selalu menetapkan target pencapaian berdasarkan umur, dan dibuat sangat spesifik. Misalnya menikah di usia 25, punya anak paling lambat 27 tahun. Menurut penelitian yang dilakukan oleh beberapa psikolog, sebenarnya perempuan, sama halnya dengan pria juga takut untuk berkomitmen, tetapi "target-target" tadi menekan mereka. Semakin dewasa dan makin luasnya wawasan, biasanya mereka akan melupakan target tadi. Bukankah lebih baik menunda pernikahan daripada terperangkap dengan orang yang salah?

3. Lingkungan dan Keluarga
Hidup dalam masyarakat yang ikatan kekeluargaannya masih kuat seperti di Indonesia tidak selalu enak. Salah satunya adalah tuntutan dan desakan dari keluarga besar jika ada salah satu anggota keluarga yang belum menikah. Ada sebagian keluarga yang menganggap bercerai masih lebih baik "ketimbang" tidak menikah sama sekali. Usia 30 tahun adalah angka keramat, jika sampai usia tersebut seseorang belum menikah dan tidak ada tanda-tanda menjalin hubungan serius, orang akan berpikir apakah ada yang salah dengan orang tersebut.

4. Uang
Biasanya terjadi pada wanita. Desakan ekonomi ternyata menjadi salah satu alasan sebagian perempuan untuk menikah. Memiliki suami kaya raya, hidup enak tanpa perlu bekerja keras masih menjadi impian. Banyak pula yang akhirnya bercerai ketika usia perkawinan mereka belum berjalan 5 tahun.

Pati (35), seorang ibu satu anak dan sudah bercerai di usia 29 tahun, membagi pengalamannya: "Meski mantan suami saya berasal dari keluarga kaya, tetapi sejak tahun lalu ia berhenti memberi tunjangan pada anak kami. Sekarang saya melanjutkan kuliah dan bekerja keras membesarkan anak saya, kelak ketika ia akan menikah saya akan memastikan ia menikah karena cinta, bukan uang."

5. Membuat Deadline Kapan Menikah
Membuat deadline kapan kita akan menikah sah-sah saja, tergantung apa motivasi yang melatar belakanginya. Dengan adanya deadline kita akan bekerja keras untuk mencapai tujuan, asalkan bukan menikah hanya untuk melengkapi tujuan.

LEBIH BAIK...

Tahu apa yang dicari
Tanyalah pada diri sendiri: bagaimana kita ingin menjalani hidup? dengan siapa? di mana? Setelah semua pertanyaan itu terjawab, siapa tahu Anda akan sadar kalau selama ini hanya membuang waktu karena berhubungan dengan orang yang salah.

Hargai target pasangan
Jika sekarang Anda sudah menemukan the right person tetapi ia belum ingin menikah, bersabarlah. Pernikahan bisa terjadi jika dua belah pihak sudah siap bukan ?

DON'T...

Menjadikan menikah sebagai tujuan hidup
Lebih baik menunda atau bahkan menolak lamaran jika hati kecil kita mengatakan tidak, daripada menghabiskan hidup tanpa rasa bahagia. Masih ingat kisah Becky di atas bukan? karena obsesinya untuk menikah ia jadi "gelap mata" dengan menjalin hubungan dengan pria yang salah.

Semua dijadikan beban
Mari kita andaikan deadline Anda telah lewat dan Anda masih juga melajang. Atau misalnya Anda telah menjalin hubungan dengan seorang pria/wanita yang baik tetapi he or she's not the one, dan Anda merasa kesal karena merasa membuang waktu dengannya. Sebenarnya tidak ada yang sia-sia, jadikan pengalaman itu sebagai pelajaran. Itu yang disebut dewasa. Tidak ada yang bisa menggantikan pengalaman hidup dari kesalahan yang pernah kita buat, karena dari situ kita justru bisa memilih orang yang lebih baik.

Lupa bersyukur
Seringkali kita jadi kecewa dan merasa jadi orang yang paling tidak berbahagia dan hidupnya tidak lengkap karena masih melajang. Kita jadi lupa kalau kita dikelilingi orang-orang yang sayang dan perhatian: keluarga, sahabat, teman-teman. Ibarat pepatah, karena nila setitik rusak susu sebelangga.

Seseorang yang percaya bahwa dirinya tetap manusia yang utuh meski belum memiliki pasangan, serta menikmati hidup dan membaginya dengan orang lain telah terbukti akan memiliki perasaan yang kuat dan biasanya kelak memiliki hubungan yang sehat dan menyenangkan dengan pasangannya.

Biarkan semua mengalir dengan wajar, tak ada yang perlu dikejar. Selama kita tetap membuka diri untuk bertemu banyak orang, seseorang yang tepat & istimewa akan datang pada saat yang tepat.

[The same theme appears again, never marry for the wrong reasons. Plus, a stronger theme also appears here, DO NOT let marriage ALL AND BE ALL. In another word, do not let it be your sole life's goal and do it just for the sake of it. There is higher purpose(s) of life and marriage is just one mean to achieve that.

Sometimes, we forgot of life's other blessings and being respectful of our own being. Let's try not to make that same mistake again. Get more out of yourself and out of life.]

Have a Blessed Eid!

Today's the awaited Eid al-Fitr, the celebration after the fasting during Ramadan. I woke up early, and prepared for the prayer in Masjid Al-Ihsan, a mosque nearby my house. I ensured myself to have a breakfast, even if only a cereal beverage, as it's a recommended act of "break-fasting" the day. It is forbidden for Muslims to fast during the 1st of Shawwal, the day is meant for celebration.

Then, I put on my new Eid clothing, courtesy of my sister-in-law, and went to the mosque. I prayed and listened to the sermon, which I think is quite controversial and subject to a post of its own. We came back about an hour and a half later, and performed our Javanese tradition of sungkeman, where we ask for forgiveness to our parents and siblings. It was probably an hour or so before the guests started coming.

Yes, we have an open house. It's an annual occurrence where guests coming to celebrate Eid, have good food, forgive each others, and catch up to their latest stories. My mom said that this year's Eid recorded the largest number of guests, more than 50 perhaps during the 10-hours event. The open house tradition is pretty much similar across different Muslim cultures. I attended such events for almost every Eid celebrations back in the States.

Well, before I hit the bed, I wish every one of you a very blessed Eid and may peace be upon you.

End of Ramadan 1428 H

Today marks the end of Ramadan of the Hijri year 1428. Tomorrow, my family and I will be performing Eid prayer together in a nearby mosque. Not unlike the previous Ramadans, certain events also surround this year's Ramadan:

• Millions of people from many metropolitan cities in Indonesia perform a "ritual" exodus (mudik) to their hometowns across the countries. During this once-a-year event, trillion rupiahs get distributed from financial hubs such as Jakarta and Surabaya, as people bring stuff and money as gifts for relatives and friends back home. Indonesians abroad working in service and manual labor also sent in their hard-earned cash via remittance so their families can celebrate Eid more joyfully.
  
• The massive phenomenon of mudik brings with it various others phenomena: from hotels full of families being left out by their servants and chauffeurs, roadway casualties of travelers (pemudik) caused by increased traffic-related accidents, distribution of alms (zakat) that rapidly turns into a riot, to the inflationary effect that economic seasonality brings with each Ramadan as people spend more during the month.
• Expecting to reap as much blessings as possible during Ramadan, Muslims drove in numbers to the nearest mosques, praying and asking for God's forgiveness. People who usually are not very religious become quite ardent in the month of Ramadan, performing good deeds left and right. A phenomenon that is quickly taken advantaged by certain groups.
• This particular Ramadan also witness the rising volcanic activities of Mount Kelud. Though it has not erupted, yet, the likely event may be a part of something potentially big.

Well, I guess that's enough late night observations for today. Better get some sleep. Tomorrow's pray schedule is rather early.

Independence Day Ceremony

Yes, my colleagues and I were actually went to work today, despite the holiday status of the Independence Day. Well, it wasn't really a work day, we went in because of the independence day ceremony. This is due to our company status as a state-owned corporation. Other private houses would let their employees sleep the weekend off and reduce their sleep deprivation instead.

The ceremony was just that, ceremonial. My last such ceremony was last year, after being absent attending one for seven years. To be honest, I didn't really know if the ceremony had achieved what it was purposed for, to remind us of the country's struggle to gain our independence and fire up our patriotic ideology. It felt rigid, formal, and insubstantial. We just stand there, listen to the speech, listen to the song, etc. Sure, it was fun afterward with all the games and brunch together. But have we really being independent? Gee, never really thought about it, have we? Read this article and decide it for yourself.

Yup, It Was A Quake

Indeed, it wasn't just me. The news confirmed that what I had experienced was indeed an earthquake. As I expected, the epicenter was relatively close at 110 km (about 70 miles) from Jakarta, specifically at 75 km (46 miles) northwest off the coast of Indramayu in West Java, at the depth of 286 km (178 miles). While it was quite devastating at 7.4 on the Richter scale magnitude, the fact that it was occurred deep under the ocean dampen its impact tremendously. No casualties and no significant material losses reported so far.

Since the quake occurred a day after Jakarta provincial election, there were comments made that it might be a bad omen for future administration of the governor-elect, Fauzi Bowo. I didn't vote during the election day since I wasn't registered due to the error in KPUD's (the commission for municipal election) part.